Are you familiar with the song "Broken Hallelujah"? Mandisa recorded it, but I heard it for the first time as part of a choral Christmas Musical. OH MY GOODNESS! See, this is one reason that I love music so much. When I can't figure out how to express my feelings, there is an anointed songwriter somewhere that has done it for me! I can then take his/her words and claim them as my own!
My heart has been so heavy and burdened lately. Randy is still unemployed, his unemployment has been exhausted, the bills haven't stopped, my Dad is entering his final weeks/months of life as he is battling lung cancer, I watched him as he fell off his deck - such a helpless feeling. I was slipping back into discouragement. Several friends and I went to Spartanburg, SC this week to Choral Festival. Everywhere I turned, I was reminded of God's promise of provision! I was reminded that my God would come! Actually, that my God has been with me all the time! Tears flowed many times over the last few days - not because of my circumstances, but because my God was there reminding me that He was with me. That He was in control. That He was faithful. I choose to praise Him no matter what - even if my praise is somewhat broken. Read the words to "Broken Hallelujah" below. This is where I am today . . .
With my love and my sadness,
I come before You, Lord.
My heart's in a thousand pieces,
maybe even more.
Yet, I trust in this moment
You're here with me somehow.
You have always been faithful
So, Lord, even now
When all that I can sing is a broken hallelujah
When my only offering is shattered praise,
Still a song of adoration will rise up from these ruins,
and I will worship You and give You thanks.
Even when my only praise is a broken hallelujah.
O Father, You have given much more than I deserve,
and I have felt Your hand of blessing on me at every turn.
How could I doubt Your goodness, Your wisdom, Your grace?
So, Lord, hear my heart in this painful place.
When all that I can sing is a broken hallelujah
When my only offering is shattered praise,
Still a song of adoration will rise up from these ruins,
and I will worship You and give You thanks.
Even when my only praise is a broken hallelujah.
I lift my voice. Your Spirit moves.
I raise my hands. I reach for You!
Hallelujah!
and I will worship You and give You thanks.
Even when my only praise is a broken hallelujah.
Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
(words and music by Gina C. Boe, Ronnie C. Freeman, and Tony Wood)
